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Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Joy from the Mourning

I'm assuming, that by now, all of you have read my news from yesterday!

I wanted to give you a few details about what we know already.


First, the facts:

~Our official due date is November 11, 2011. Yup...that's right....11-11-11 (although I do not anticipate the arrival to actually happen on that day....) :o)

~I am currently 8 weeks and 3 days. (we have known about this for 4-5 weeks now! I've been bursting inside to tell you all!)

~I am considered high risk because of the hemorrhage as well as the heart defect. At first I was kinda bummed about being considered high risk, but then I realized that we will get top notch care throughout my entire pregnancy because of it. We are putting together an unofficial team of doctors who will be involved in the care of both myself and the baby- pediatric cardiologists, perinatologists (did I even spell that right?!), pediatricians, my OB, and anyone else that we may need later down the line. I take comfort in knowing that I will have such a great team of doctors who will be caring for us!

~My OB has not scheduled any early ultrasounds. I don't know if he will or not. (I kinda hope he does...I wanna make sure there is just one in there!!!)

~Around 18-20 weeks we will have an echo on the baby. We will be praying that this baby is whole and healthy in every aspect.


~I sooooooo appreciate all of your support, love, and prayers. Part of me was really nervous to let the cat out of the bag. I was afraid of what some of the "not so nice" commenters would say. I think it's quite sad that I have to worry about their hatefulness. Don't you?!

We have been sooooo excited to announce the expected arrival of our "Rainbow Baby." I'm not usually one for cutesy terms of endearment, but the term rainbow baby could not be any more accurate for our little one that we are so eagerly anticipating.

Here is the definition of a "Rainbow Baby."

 "Rainbow Baby" is the understanding that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of the storm. When a rainbow appears, it doesn't mean the storm never happened or that the family is not still dealing with its aftermath. What it means is that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover but the rainbow provides a counterbalance of color, energy and hope."

This baby is our long awaited promise. This baby will never replace Joshua, but without Joshua's life and death, this baby would have never come to be. It is our promised joy that came from the mourning. It is our answer to prayer that came with a resounding "Yes" after many many "No's."

I participated in a meeting a few weeks ago. We were talking about some ideas and concerns regarding a new ministry that will be opening in our town. The organizers of the ministry hit some road bumps along the way, but they explained that God had been faithful and had restored what was lost to them- down to the tiny details.

Wow. He restored what was lost to them. He did not replace them, or give them back, but he restored what was lost.

As I sat through that meeting, I could not help but hold back the tears. God has restored what was lost. He has poured out His blessing and has rewarded us with His mercy.

We are so excited to welcome this new little one into our lives. We are praying for a healthy pregnancy and a healthy baby, but we are trusting that God already knows this little one inside and out and no matter what happens, this baby will always be our joy that came from the mourning.




 

24 comments:

Shannon said...

Congratulations Jill! I'm so excited for all of you!!

Unknown said...

You "speak" so well, as you've expressed this amazing news and a wonderful explanation of the place you and Shane have come to. Your words also represent our family as well as so many others. We are very grateful for God's wonderful timing, in all things.
Congratulations!

The Price Family! said...

I am over joyed for you and your family! I will continue to pray for all of you daily!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations, Jill and family! This is a beautiful blessing! You are all in my thoughts. :)

carlasue476 said...

I have been grateful to have the "inside scoop" for the past few weeks and can't wait to meet Rainbow Baby in November, although I'm sure that he/she and I will have a few chats while he/she is still in utero. I gotta teach 'em how to be born! ;) Love you all: Shane, Jill, Caleb, Hannah, Joshua and Rainbow Baby! *hugs*

Amy said...

Wow, I had chills reading that Rainbow Baby definition. Yes, definitely appropriate. This baby is, indeed, a rainbow. I'm so happy for you, Jill!!! <3

Stefenie said...

Congratulations Jill! I am so very happy for all of you!! Praying for a very healthy baby in there!!

Anonymous said...

Oh that is so wonderful Jill! I am so happy for you and your family. God bless you and keep that beautiful baby safe and healthy. I'm so glad you will be getting the best care during this pregnancy to keep that baby safe and you as well. *huge hugs* to you my dear! I think you are brave for having another child after going through what you went through with Joshua. My son Keegan has dealt with cancer since he was 3 months, and I'm terrifed of thought of having another child, I'm scared this child will have cancer, or something else super scary. My cousin, who has a son with HLHS is also afraid to have anymore children and they've settled on just having the one son. So I think you are very brave! Praying the best for you and that miracle baby!

Anonymous said...

Congratulations! I am so very happy for you. I was thinking about you all morning. Yay!

Jillian said...

Beautiful post, really Jill. Made me tear up actually. But a lot of your posts do that to me lol. :) I'm so happy for your Rainbow Baby, I love that term! I wish you and your family nothing but ultimate happiness and love. <3

-Jillian

http://www.themtandersenfamily.blogspot.com

Auntie M said...

Beautiful! All of it. God is indeed faithful. It makes a huge difference having him in your boat on a stormy sea, doesn't it? xo

Lisette said...

CONGRATULATIONS!!!! I was scared to be considered high risk as well but now I am so glad that I have been. Praying for a healthy heart for your rainbow. Let me tell you that echo will be so darn hard to get through, when I heard a perfect heart I just broke down. A rainbow pregnancy brings on so many more new emotions but it is worth it. I am almost 35 weeks now and although I am scared I am so excited. Once again congrats to you ((HUGS)).

Mellow said...

Jill, you speak the hearts of all the mothers like us who have lost our little ones. Praise God that there is Joy, and we can see that glimmer of hope through the darkness of our pain. I know how you feel about sharing, we struggled with that too...not knowing how others would respond, especially since we were not trying to "replace" our son that died. There are no replacements for them. I pray you have a wonderful and uneventful pregnancy. I am so very happy for you.

If you don't mind, one of my rainbow babies is in need of some prayer, we found out last week that her cord didn't form in the placenta, so she is 2 weeks behind in her growth, it seems that her sister is doing okay and growing well. We know it's in God's hands, and we have faith He will pull her through to a healthy delivery and baby...but after our loss, we are scared. I hate that part of what loss has done to us. Anyway...So thrilled for you, I know how your heart must be soaring right now. Lots of love and prayers coming your way.

tqoe62 said...

Congratulations. I hope this baby is healthy, well and whole. Peace and Bright Blessings to your family. www.thewholenetwork.org

Lindsey said...

"Around 18-20 weeks we will have an echo on the baby. We will be praying that this baby is whole and healthy in every aspect."

Yes he/she will be Whole. Please keep them that way.

Congrats on your pregnancy and Good Luck! 11-11-11 is a pretty special due date.

Jill said...

Lindsey,

I truly appreciate the kind words.

However, I am asking that you not turn this into a public service announcement or debate. You have made your cause and beliefs very well known to me and my readers in the not so distant past. If I continue getting "Public Service Announcements" like this, I will turn off comments all together.

Jill said...

clarification from the comment above....

When I say "You" I don't mean you personally, I mean Your group....

StevenSauke said...

Hooray! I'll be praying for a healthy pregnancy.

Ausmerican Housewife - Creating with Kara Davies said...

:D

Steph said...

Congratulations, that is wonderful news. I am so happy for you and your family.

Peggy said...

Jill I'm SO happy for you! And I'm kinda excited to be sharing this journey with you! I'm pregnant with our rainbow baby as well, and we're also due 11.11.11!!!!

Many prayers and love go out to you and your whole family. <3

God is good.

El said...

May you bask in the peace of a beautiful pregnancy! CONGRATS!!!!

Anonymous said...

So happy for you and your family. I will continue to hold you and your lil' rainbow up in prayer!!

Amy said...

So, I'm really late in reading this news, but congratulations!! I'm excited for you guys! Also read your post about coming to Dallas, and now I'm bummed! That's where we are from originally, and we were stationed 3 hours from there a year ago! Sadly, we are not in South Korea. Enjoy your trip (and good luck)! I flew here with my 3 alone, so I can feel your pain. :D

 
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