Saturday, December 25, 2010


Since the day Joshua died, I have been dreading Christmas. I have been dreading the empty feeling. Thinking about the memories that we will never have with him.

I have been wrapped up in the should have beens, the sadness, and the grief.

And while it’s ok for me to feel those things, I also have been reminded that this is not about me. Christmas is not about me. This life is not about me.

I am reminded this season to remember that a baby was born. A baby who would never sin. A baby who came to save. A baby who would eventually die for us. A baby named Jesus.

It has nothing to do with me. While my grief is, at times, unbearable, I am choosing to continue to celebrate the life of Christ. This is, afterall, His birthday!! He was born, lived, suffered and died. He did it all so that we can live with him forever.

So while my heart continues to yearn for my sweet son, I am also reminded of the greatest gift that we could ever receive. The gift of Jesus.

So as you celebrate Christmas this year, I pray that you will hug your children, kiss your spouse, and thank God for his unending love for us. A love that was enough to save us. A love that makes us clean. A love that can heal our broken hearts.

Merry Christmas my friends.


Christine the ArizonaIntactivist said...


Molly Alisa Photography said...

Merry Christmas Jill. :)

amandadahmes said...

Merry Christmas honey. THoughts and prayers for you today

Paula B said...

Merry Christmas from Indiana at the Blackstone household!

Beth W. said...

Merry Christmas Jill!!! Thinking of you today.

Deidre said...

Merry Christmas my dear friend. I hope you found some peace and joy in your day.

mootpoynt said...

I couldn't let Christmas pass without stopping to say hello. I hope the day had moments of sweetness and grace for you all.


StevenSauke said...

It just occurred to me...this is the time of year that we celebrate the birth of a precious baby. Jesus probably didn't have CHD, but with such a difficult journey on a donkey, and then a delivery in a dirty, smelly stable, Mary's pregnancy was probably not the easiest ever. She had to go through all kinds of ridicule, and probably the gossip was flying about this baby she had out of wedlock. People who thought they knew what they were talking about, and actually didn't have a clue, were probably spreading lies and untruths about her, and in addition to the normal pains of pregnancy, I'm sure she had all kinds of people judging her for something she didn't do. Not only that, but 33 years later, she stood at the foot of the cross and watched her beloved miraculous son die the most painful death imaginable.

Though your situations are different, you and Mary have a lot in common.

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