Monday, August 30, 2010

2 weeks

My baby is 2 weeks old today! There is so much I want to say, but not sure how to put it all into words.

Joshua is such a fighter. I am amazed at his strength. I am amazed at his will to live. Even more, I'm amazed at how God has carried him through this and given him the strength that he has needed to endure what he has endured.

Over the past 2 weeks my sweet baby has gone through more than most of us ever will in a lifetime. He has endured a birth, open heart surgery, having his chest left open for days, closing his chest, drug withdrawl, and now learning to feed.

We are headed back to the NICU today and we covet your prayers for even more progess to be made. Joshua is headed back to the NICU to learn how to eat. Babies with HLHS typically have a hard time sucking, swallowing, and eating.

We have gotten through the hard part of recovery, but learning to eat can be the long part. Pray that Joshua doesn't have any excessive feeding issues and that we can get it all under control fairly quickly. It's a big step to get back to the NICU- it's one step closer to home.

Also, pray for me as Shane has gone back to work. Life is moving on while Joshua and I are still here. I'm being taken out of my comfort zone of the PICU and will be staying with a friend 3 or 4 days a week. I'm not a huge fan of change, so trying to figure out where and what I will eat each day, going back and forth from my friends house to the hosptial hotel, and figuring out my new routine is stressing me out. I wish Shane was here with me to help me get adjusted, but it's time for me to put my big girl pants on and figure it out on my own.

Finally, pray for Shane, Caleb, and Hannah. Shane is now working full time, playing full time dad, and managing the household. I almost feel like he has the hard part of all of this. Pray for him to stay strong, healthy, rested, and sane. Pray for Caleb and Hannah as they are adjusting back to their normal routine, and continuing to adjust to being away from me.

I'm praying that the next few weeks will go quickly and hopefully these past 2 weeks will become a distant memory. I'm praising God for His faithfulness over the past 2 weeks and trusting him for our future.

Happy 2 weeks baby boy!!!!


leah said...

Happy 2 weeks. can't wait to see more pics! Miss you all.

kirsten michelle said...

Happy 2 weeks Joshua!! I am amazed at what he has endured also and how he's come through it. I know there have been so many scary moments, but he's still here fighting. Thanks be to God for giving him the strength he needed for this battle (I keep thinking of the passage you mentioned: Have I not commanded you? ... gives me such CHILLS thinking about it).

I hope you and Shane and Caleb and Hannah are all able to adjust to this time where so much is being asked fo each and every one of you. Even though it's temporary, I know it totally stinks. I hope you find your balance and know that no matter where you are or what you're doing in the midst of this, you're loving your family.

Love you, mama!!

Anonymous said...

Saying prayers that the adjustment is a little easier for you than you think it will be. I can relate to the because I also dislike change. Big time! Saying prayers that Joshua takes to feeding quickly and the steps forward keep marching on! Praying for Shane Caleb and Hannah as they take on the role that they are in until you get home. You guys have been through so much and are such a strong family! Praying for all of you!

Heather - SCH board said...

Happy two week birthday Joshua!! I am praying that feeding goes well! I don't have a heart baby, but I DO have 2 preemie twins and I know first hand how frustrating, yet rewarding feeding practice can be! Hang in there mama!

Stefenie said...

Happy 2 weeks Joshua!! Praying that the transition to the NICU goes well for all of you and that Joshua makes great progress in his eating. Most heart parents have had to deal with feeding issues with their babies. It takes time and a lot of patience.

As for feeling guilty with spending time with your kids. It is incredibly hard. I have been there too many times and having to choose which child to be with is hard. I have prayed many nights for Wyatt to someday forgive me for the choices I made during all of Logan's surgeries. I feel for you. Just know that your other kiddos know how very much you love them. Keep reminding them of that and that you will all be together again very soon.

Veronica said...

Happy two weeks, sweet Joshua! He is looking so alert and good in the photos..thanks for sharing Jill~ hope the transition to NICU goes well. I can't believe they stop the breastfeeding mamas trays, they sure shouldn't!

BlessedMommy said...

I love reading the updates on Joshua! Shane is being a wonderful dad and husband! God bless him! My prayers will be with you as you return to work, I can't imagine how hard that will be!!!

Anonymous said...

I second what Stefenie said. It can tear your heart out trying to determine what child needs you the most. I hate to admit this - but I often envy heart parents that have only one child. They can focus all their time and attention on their heart baby. I, too, hope that one day my son will forgive me for the times I have had to leave his side while I spent the night in the hospital with his sister. Just keep telling yourself that you will all be together soon.

Hope the feeding issues go smoothly....ours did not and we ended up with a g-tube for 5 months. But I will be honest with you - while I fought it at first because it was "one more thing" it became my best friend. Meds go so much easier thru a feeding tube (I think so) and you can feed while driving.

Happy 2nd week birthday Joshua - we are praying for you!

Shannon Egan

Michael Bowman-King said...

Happy 2 weeks sweet Joshua! What an amazing boy you are and what AMAZING parents you have!

I think you will do just fine Jill, look at how strong you will surprise yourself!

We are always praying....never stopped! The King family sends tons of love, prayers and heart hugs ALWAYS!

Paula Blackstone said...

My prayers for all the adjustments that your family is going through. All of you will get through this. Some minutes will probably be easier than others. You are correct - change is very hard, especially when we have no control of what change is to happen. God is with you all the way along with all of your family and friends, and even people you don't know that are praying for you guys. Give my little Popeye a kiss on the forehead. Love all of you.

Cindy Gibson said...

Happy 2 weeks Joshua! I know you are a fighter, I can see it in your eyes!
Who would have thought there is so much involved in feeding. I pray that Joshua is able to tolerate it. I don't know how or why we are chosen to be heart moms. I've heard God just knows who to give these babies with special hearts to. I had thought, God thinks I'm strong? I don't want to be that strong. But I was, and you are. I don't know what it's like to have a husband have to go back to work, or how it would feel to be separated from my other children, so please know I will praying for you as your family makes this adjustment. God will be with you and get you through. With many prayers, Cindy

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