And the Aquaphor Winner is.........

Drum Roll Please.......................................

Comment number 17!!!!

Danielle who authors the blog Life at the Hatchery!!!

Danielle- please email me at jillhaskins1@yahoo.com with your mailing address and the great folks at Aquaphor will get your package out to you soon!!!

Congratulations Danielle!!!

(and just FYI: I took out 3 comments from the total comment number because I responded to 3 posts. I did not include my posts in the giveaway!)

Aquaphor Giveaway!!!

A few weeks ago, I wrote about my new found love for Aquaphor.

I was not paid for my post, nor did I expect anything to come out of it. I simply wanted to share my love of all things Aquaphor.

My posts automatically post to my Twitter and Facebook. The kind people at Aquaphor caught wind of that post through "the twitter" (as my dad used to call it) and sent me an email asking if I would be willing to do an official review of their product.

Since I've been having a secret love affair with Aquaphor, I immediately said I would LOVE to try some more product and do an official review for them.

They then told me that I could also hold a giveaway to share the Aquaphor love. YES. PLEASE.

After a few days of waiting, a package arrived in the mail. It contained this.

Not only did it contain Aquaphor product, but it also contained a $50 Visa Gift Card to be used however I  pleased! (I may or may not have gone to Joann Fabric and bought waaaayyyy too much fabric with it!)

Let me tell you. This package could not have come at a better time.

I had been sick for a few weeks prior to the package's arrival and my nose was dry and cracked from blowing my nose. My lips had split from being so dry from having to breathe out of my mouth. Not to mention, my skin was pretty dry and flaky from the dry winter months.

After just one application of the Healing Ointment, my nose felt so much better. It was no longer flaky and cracked. I could actually put a tissue to it without cringing from pain. My hands and forearms also felt a lot less tight and itchy from the dry skin. I'm telling you. This stuff is amazing.

Now, onto my lips. A few years ago, I blew myself up with the gas grill. (Don't ask....seriously.) Ever since then, I have had some scarring on my lips from the burns that I received from that accident. On occasion, the skin on those scars peel, tear, and bleed. Add a nasty head cold, in which I can't breathe out of my nose, and my lips became a hot mess.

After just two applications of the Aquaphor Lip Repair, my lips were feeling much better. The Lip Repair didn't burn my lips like some chapsticks do. It was very gentle. It helped heal the cracks in my lips and allowed my scars to heal. In fact, after using it almost constantly for the past week, the scars on my lips feel a lot softer and a lot less noticeable. YES!!! (the only downside is that a certain someone can't seem to keep his lips off of mine....cute at first, but kind of annoying after a while!) ;o)

So, here is the best part of all of this.

The kind folks at Aquaphor would love to give away a tube of their Healing Ointment, a tube of their Lip Repair, AND a $50 Visa Gift card to be used however you want! Isn't that sweet?!?!

So, here is how you enter.

Leave a comment below. Any old comment will do (but I would also love to hear your favorite Aquaphor product, if you have one). It's that simple.

I will leave comments open from right now until 9pm Thursday (4/19) evening.  Then I will use Random.org to choose the winner!

Also, for a 2nd chance to win, feel free to head over to my friend Amy's blog. She is holding the very SAME giveaway. Leave her some love and get yourself entered to win! You are welcome!


Also, for more info about Aquaphor, feel free to check out their Facebook page by clicking HERE.

In case it wasn't clear enough in this post, I was, in fact, compensated by Aquaphor for this post. I was given the Healing Ointment and the Lip Repair to review. I was also given a $50 Visa Gift Card. However, the opinions expressed are mine. 


This giveaway is only open to US Residents who are 18 years of age or older.

Letting Go- Part 1

It has been no secret that over this past year or more, our family has had our fair share of struggles.

Our faith has been stretched in ways that I would have never thought possible. I have screamed out to God in desperation like never before. I have clung to His promises by my fingertips, unsure of where the strength to hang on would come from. I have felt God closer than ever before. I have also felt completely abandoned, lost and forgotten by Him as I have floundered around with questions of faith.

We have walked through the fire, and I would like to believe that we have come out on the other side with a stronger and more real faith (although it is a much messier and more painful version of the faith that we once had).

The fire has burned us, molded us, and stretched us. Our hearts have been broken and our faith has been tested. We still feel the pain from those burns, but are slowly recovering and allowing God to heal us in ways that only He can.

As I've walked this path, there are very few things that have remained the same in my life. I am no longer the Jill that I once was. My family is not the same that we once were. We have loved fully and lost deeply. Our faith no longer comes easily- it is messy, hard, and painful.

But here we are. In just one short month, Joshua will have been gone for a year. It's been one whole year since my child left my arms and entered into the presence of God himself.

What a year this has been.

I will admit, I still struggle. My faith still hurts and is sometimes extremely hard. My heart will never be the same. I will never be the same.

But through it all, God has remained steadfast. He has never left my side- even when I have felt like He is nowhere to be found, He has always been there- loving me. Even as I screamed four letter words at him and blamed him for taking my child away from me, He has been there. He has protected us and provided for us through the attacks on our family and through the foreclosure of our home. He has always remained faithful- even when we couldn't see or feel it.

Part of His faithfulness has been through providing us with people and resources at the exact moment that we have needed it. God has brought people into our lives for very specific purposes.

Two of those people are Matt and Sarah Hammitt. (Matt is the lead singer for Sanctus Real) Their son Bowen, was born shortly after Joshua. Bowen has the same exact heart defect that Joshua had.

While Sarah and I were both pregnant with our boys, we were able to connect and share experiences through a few forums and through email.. I followed their story through both their blog and through the updates on KLOVE while Joshua was in the hospital. I prayed for them as they walked in and saw a nurses hands inside their child's chest, performing chest compressions to keep Bowen alive.

Just a week after Joshua died, Shane and I had the privilege of going to to Mott's Children's Hospital to visit with Matt, Sarah and Baby Bowen.

Since then, we have continued to follow Bowen's story. We have said countless prayers for him and his family as they adjusted to life at home. We have prayed for them as they continue to minister to other families who have been affected by CHD.

Matt and Sarah have been such a blessing to our family. They have ministered to us in ways that I don't think they will ever be able to understand.

Over the next few days, I am going to share more about Matt and Sarah's ministry. I want to share with you how God has worked through them to bring healing to my life and my faith. And finally, on Friday, I am going to help them bless you by offering a free copy of Matt's newest solo CD to 3 of my readers.

Please stay tuned as I share their powerful story and how it has changed my life and my faith.

Another Giveaway coming soon!!!

Hey friends,

I've been on a little blogging hiatus.

Things have gotten busy around here lately, and I just haven't felt like sitting down to write a post (not to mention the post that I really want to get done, just won't come! aaarrrggg....)

I wanted to tell you to keep your eyes open next week, though.

I have 3 of Matt Hammitt's from Sanctus Real's newest CD's to give away to 3 lucky readers sorry about that horrible sentence structure!!!! yikes...! (if you aren't familiar with Sanctus Real, I want to encourage you to go check them out- they are amazing!!!)

If you haven't already heard about them, Matt Hammitt's (the lead singer of Sanctus Real) son, Bowen was born shortly after Joshua with Hypoplastic Left Heart Syndrome. Matt and his wife Sarah have made it a priority to help other families who are affected by CHD by starting a foundation. The newest CD that Matt has recorded are the songs that he wrote when Bowen was in the hospital after birth.

I will tell you first hand, this CD is POWERFUL. I can't wait to give 3 of you the opportunity to win a copy!

Be looking out for the giveaway next week!

Until then, hopefully my mind and my heart will click and I will be able to finish the darn post that I've been working on for 4 days now! :o)

BBQ Giveaway Winners!

Thanks to all who entered my very first giveaway! I'm so excited to announce the two winners of a jar of BBQ!

I used Random.org to generate random numbers to choose the winners for me! I've included the screen shot of the numbers and counted from the top down in the comment section!

Congratulations to Rachel  (number 8) and  Jayme (number 18)!!!!

Please email me at jillhaskins1@yahoo.com with your mailing address and I will get your sauce out to you as soon as possible!

If you are dying to try some sauce for yourself (trust me...you wanna try this stuff!) feel free to head over to Master's Hand BBQ website and order some directly from them! You can also become a fan on Facebook right HERE!

Happy BBQ-ing!!!

A Way to Honor and Remember

After I wrote yesterday's post, I sat down to really think about what we should to for Joshua's birthday.

I don't want to have a social gathering of some sort. I don't want to be a blubbering fool in front of people.

I do want to spend the day with my family. Remember, looking at pictures, and doing something special with the kids to help them remember.

But I also want to give others, who love Joshua, an opportunity to remember and honor him. There were so many who loved him, were affected by his life, and who knew him- either personally or through my blog.

All of a sudden, an idea came to mind.

I want to open my blog up. I want to allow others to share their thoughts about Joshua and his life. I want others to help remember and honor him.

Joshua lived from August 16 to October 6. 51 days. I have every single day of his life recorded on this blog (except for 2 that I removed and will not be reposting.)

I would love to fill those days that he lived, a whole year ago, with letters of love and remembrance from those who loved him the most.

I already have a handful of people who are working on letters or posts about him. I want to open that opportunity up to you as well.

If you feel led, I would love for you to write a guest post, a letter, a remembrance, a testimony about how Joshua impacted your life and email it to me. Include identifying information about yourself and also tell me how much info you would like me to share about you. I am happy to post links to your blog if you want me to.

I will start posting your letters/posts on August 16th all the way through October 6th.

I will also donate all of the earnings during that time period from my BlogHer contract/ads to the NICU at Joshua's hospital. I would love to be able to help them purchase photo paper and/or a new digital camera to use within the NICU. Some of the pictures that the NICU took of Joshua are our most precious. I know they go through photo paper and digital cameras like crazy- I want to make sure the families of critically ill babies have plenty of pictures of their little ones.

So, I want you to think about it. If you feel led to share your thoughts about our precious little man, please email your posts to jillhaskins1@yahoo.com. (I reserve the right to pick and choose posts to publish and will not publish posts that are controversial or attacking.)

I'm excited to share these upcoming days with you. There are so many of you who have been an amazing support to our family over the past 9 months. There are so many of you who loved Joshua in a way that I could never imagine. I am so excited about sharing this journey with you as we honor and remember Joshua's life.

Something Special

Recently, my in-laws came for a visit.

I really never know quite what to expect when they come, but we love having them!

This past visit, my father in law brought a little surprise with him.

In honor of Joshua, he bought the Peyton Manning Children's Hospital license plate. PMCH is the hospital where Joshua had his 2 open heart surgeries and where spent 1/2 of his life.

It's not very often that our extended family acknowledges that Joshua was and is a part of our family. I'm not sure if it's because they don't want to cause us pain, or if it's because they, themselves, are grieving. But his name doesn't get brought up very often unless we are the ones doing the talking.

My father in law brought both Shane and I to tears with his thoughtfulness.  We never asked him to make that purchase, and we certainly didn't expect it. He remembered and loved remembers and loves his grandson and this was such a unique and special way to show it!

There is something so special about people remembering and honoring Joshua is such small ways. It doesn't happen very often, but when it does, it brings more healing to our broken hearts than anyone can imagine.

So, Pop Pop, thank you for your gift (even if it wasn't for us). Thank you for remembering your grandson who was here and was taken too soon. Thank you for keeping his memory alive in the smallest of ways and bringing healing to our broken hearts.

Joshua's Corner

Before Joshua ever came to be, our family struggled with our finances. Early on in our marriage, we didn't have enough money to go around which in turn racked up a lot of credit card debt. We also made some pretty stupid decisions regarding car purchases, as well my choice in a super expensive private college that really racked up the student loans.

Add a couple kids to the mix and a few periods of unemployment, and we really REALLY struggled.

Love In The Name of Christ is a National Christian based organization that readily meets the needs of the community. In our greatest time of need, they came along side us and helped when we needed it the most. They helped to provide food, assistance in getting our car repaired, and most importantly they prayed daily as a staff for Joshua from the time of his diagnosis to the time of his death (they faithfully checked my blog every morning for updates and prayed where it was needed!). Once he died, their prayers shifted to peace and comfort for our family.

They have been an amazing support for our family as we have finally gotten back on our feet and been able to be on the giving end of helping rather than the receiving end.

Recently Love, INC opened a thrift store in their Huntington building. It is a ministry that helps to clothe our community with free and/or inexpensive clothing to anyone who walks through their doors. Recently, I met with the intake coordinator, and she presented me with something that made me break down in tears.

This is Joshua's Corner.

Joshua's Corner is the infant and children's section of the thrift store. It was created in honor and in memory of our sweet Joshua and his precious life.

The coordinator explained that Joshua's life made an impact on the staff and volunteers of Love and they wanted him to be remembered. There was no better way than this to honor his life- by providing clothes and Christ's love to the many precious children of our community.

Yesterday was the official opening day of the thrift store and I was so excited to see how many people were there not only receiving quality clothes, but also hearing about and experiencing Christ's love. I'm so humbled and honored that Joshua's life will be a part of such an amazing ministry!

If you are in the Huntington area and want to be a part of this amazing ministry, there are several ways to get involved. Covered with Love accepts donations of gently used clothing and house hold items- they especially need children's clothing. They are also always looking for volunteers for their many ministries. You can find the Huntington Love, INC on Facebook right HERE and you can find the Covered With Love Facebook page right HERE!

Prayers for a Friend

Do you remember this post? I wanted to give you an update and ask for some serious prayers.


My sweet bloggy friend, Marsha, was pregnant with two beautiful twin girls. There was a problem with the cord with one of the babies. They were holding onto hope that God was going to bring their sweet baby through, but that was not meant to be. One of their sweet baby girls went to be with Jesus shortly after my initial prayer request post.

However, her sister is fine. She is growing and thriving. Marsha and her husband are trying to focus their energy on their beautiful little girl that has made it so far.

Marsha and I have been emailing back and forth and recently, Marsha was admitted to the hospital in premature labor on April 25th. She is currently 26 weeks.

Most recently, they found that the baby that passed is going to be delivered soon. Doctors are confident that they can stop labor when it happens, keeping the healthy baby tucked away safely inside Marsha to continue growing.

Marsha and I are begging for your prayers of safety, comfort, and wisdom for everyone involved in her situation. They have already experienced an infant loss and now a prenatal loss- all in the last year- the last thing they need to experience is the loss of the other baby.

Please, if you feel led, head over to Marsha's Blog and leave her some words of encouragement and prayers.

Thanks so much my sweet bloggy friends! There is power in prayer- I've experienced it first hand! Let's pass it on to another who needs it!

Helping Babies

I received a card in the mail today.

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I took a deep breath.

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I read it.

Tears flowed freely.

1532 ounces of Joshua's milk donated

 to the Indiana Mother's Milk Bank.

As if that little boy didn't do enough in his short little life.

He's saving other babies' lives in his death.

Oh how I miss that sweet baby of mine.

These 3 Names

These 3 names: Caleb, Hannah, Joshua.

These 3 names have very young lives behind them.

Each of them unique and perfectly created.

These 3 names give me reason to get out of bed each day

These 3 names have ALL of my love.

These 3 names are my world.

Because of one of these names,

we are able to help make a difference in others lives.

Because of two of these namse,

my life will continue on.

I am thankful for these 3 beautiful names.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Giving

I catch myself these day. Dreaming. Desiring. Wishing.

Not for earthly things. But to give. Time. Energy. Resources. I'm hungry to give to others so they can experience the love that God has for them.

My heart has been broken. I will never be the same. We have been given much through Joshua's life and death. God has provided for our every need at the exact moment we need it.

We have been able to give more than we have ever expected to because of Joshua. Each gift we give, brings me to tears because without Joshua and his life, we would never be able to do it.

I find joy in giving. I find peace in giving.

My children have caught on to this without us even explicitly teaching them. Caleb and Hannah want to give their pennies. They want to give their toys (not all, but some). They want to give their clothes that are too small.

As we come into the holiday season, my emotions and my heart are torn. I am so thankful, but I'm also crushed. My sweet baby won't be here with us, but the changes he has made in us and others will be here throughout the season.

I want to honor him by giving. No matter how big or small. A few pennies goes along way in God's kingdom when given with a joyful heart.